|
By Amina Nazarli
There is a saying which goes "An entire sea of water can't sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship."
Similarly, the negativity of the world can't put you down unless you allow it to get inside your soul.
Sometimes we live according to others' rules: We smoke because others smoke. We dress in a way which is not desirable for us only because to take pace with the latest fashion. We start to eat what is fashionable and not what we really want.
Life can be summarized as finding what makes you happy and removing what upsets you. But you don't need to live based on others' ideal notions. You can break their rules and live your own life. Caring about others' ideas will never bring you happiness.
Even some people who view themselves independent find others' opinions highly important. This can greatly affect their lives particularly if they pay too much attention to others' opinions.
A child is constantly told to do this or not to do that. Most mothers say to their disobedient child: "Oh, how ugly you're behaving? The uncle will punish you. What others will say about you?" Thus, from the earliest years a certain pattern of behavior is formed. The essence of this pattern is very simple -- "live like others, otherwise you would be condemned."
It is partly because some sectors of the society simply cannot get rid of their stereotypes. They can't accept the fact that everyone can have their own point of view on a particular matter and that everyone's life belongs to themselves.
Have you ever changed your opinion? Have you sit back and given up your dreams just because you were afraid of others opinions?
How funny it is to listen to grandmothers sitting on the benches all day and criticizing people passing by without having enough knowledge about them.
We usually care about our appearance when going out. Because we take into account the judgments of others.
Dependence on people around us and their opinions are one of the considerable sources of suffering for each of us. It also directly destroys our successes.
Moreover, such dependence can put us in trouble because sometimes we are ready to do any stupidity in order others not to think something bad of us. Fearful of different opinions, we often cannot dress in our desired style. Sometimes we even decide to get married just because we are almost 30 and everyone thinks that it is now the time to marry.
Finally, I want to emphasize that sometimes we need to consult a professional or just an experienced person on some issues. Meanwhile, we need to stop thinking about others' ideas and begin to live happily. Accept yourself as you are. Then you'll find people who fall in love with you. Having such people around you is among the main achievements of each person's life.